Cancer men are an interesting bunch. These guys love having connections and being in relationships. Love is a very big part of how they want to express themselves in the world.
They can often stay in very sticky and toxic relationships because they are so afraid of ending things with someone. Cancer men hate being on their own. So breakups are very difficult for them to go through.
However, what pushes a Cancer man to break up with someone? What are the signs a Cancer man wants to break up? These are just some of the questions you might be asking yourself if you are dating a Cancer man and feel a level of uncertainty about him at the moment.
You might notice him acting a little strangely around you. And all signs might be indicating that he no longer wants to be with you. Or, has your Cancer man broken up with you and are you wondering will a Cancer man come back after a breakup?
We’ll be exploring all of these very difficult questions in this article. As usual, I am here to give you good guidance about what you need to know about Cancer men after a breakup.
When A Cancer Man Breaks Up With You
If a Cancer man is planning on ending things with his partner; he may become distant, quiet, he may spend more time away, or he may have excuses as to why he cannot stick around.
He isn’t good at breaking up as he feels things so deeply. Even though he knows it may be the right thing to do; he doesn’t want to hurt anyone. This makes him procrastinate actually going through with it.
It’s also very likely that if you try to approach him or ask him what is wrong; he may not want to answer you. He feels if he tells the truth; it’ll hurt you and so he’d rather just keep blowing the matter off.
In some way; he perhaps hopes things will miraculously change so that he won’t have to actually go through with a breakup. In some cases; he may be so entirely distant that he’s hoping that his partner will be the one to break it off.
A cancer man never wants to appear as a bad guy and sometimes it’s easier to just be really distant so that his partner decides enough is enough. If she calls it off then he’s not the bad guy and his heart won’t break by breaking hers.
I know it sounds kind of twisted but this is how totally emotionally tied a Cancer man is. Avoiding hurting anyone is his goal. Even if he lies or cheats; he won’t want to hurt whoever is involved. It’s guilt for selfish reasons.
If You Broke Up With A Cancer Man
If you decide that the Cancer man isn’t for you; you may think about calling it quits. He will likely sense this and start to sulk, pout, or pull back into his crabby shell.
Depending on how close he was to you; he may emotionally try to lash out or he may try to beg you to stay. Either way; you’re not going to feel good about breaking a Cancer man’s heart.
Of course, if he hasn’t been particularly good to you; then it may be a bit easier. Naturally, if he’s betrayed your trust by cheating or something else equal to you; you’ll probably have no trouble at all telling him you’re done.
When you sit him down to talk to him about this if he’s a good guy that it just didn’t work with; he’ll most definitely look like a sad puppy dog. It’s very difficult but try to remember the reasons you want out.
Perhaps if you can do it quickly and not give him too much time to ponder or respond; you can get out of there without too much drama. They can be drama queens in emotional situations such as these.
He may try to cry, plead, beg, or make you feel bad for having broken him. Put your shield up and do what you need to do. Don’t let the manipulation work and keep you where you know you don’t want to be.
Why Did My Cancer Man Leave Me?
Since he feels things deeply; if he ever senses dishonesty; he will not want to keep it going. If you lie, keep things from him, or aren’t upfront with how you feel; he may second guess why he’s with you.
If you betray him by talking to another guy romantically, cheat on him physically, or even give another ma your attention; he’ll be done. A cancer man needs security in his relationship.
When he can sense that there isn’t any security or that it has been breached; he’ll be done with the relationship/marriage. It’s incredibly difficult to get a Cancer man to ever trust once a betrayal has occurred.
Once he goes into his shell; he tends to want to stay there until someone else comes along that gives him the security he seeks. It may take him a good long while to heal from his wounds.
Then again; he may move on very quickly if the right person should emerge at the right time. Getting back together with a Cancer man is a very difficult task to take on if you broke it off but didn’t mean it.
Trust has been broken therefore his security was thwarted and he may or may not ever get over that. I’m not saying it’s impossible but it would be very difficult. He may seem as though he’s alright but in reality; he will carry that scar.
Cancer man doesn’t survive anyone who is critical or mean toward him either. He’s a very sensitive guy with a big heart. When someone is mean to him or constantly critiques him; he’ll not stay with that person.
He struggles with his own inner self enough as it is. The last thing he wants is a partner who cannot stop picking on him or giving him grief. Also, a woman that doesn’t get along with his family may be a deal breaker as well.
Does A Cancer Man Move On Quickly
A Cancer man is one of the slowest moving men when it comes to his relationships. He does not rush into anything and this is because he is very protective of himself and his feelings.
When he breaks up with a woman the likelihood of him being rather broken is very high. He will definitely take his time mourning the loss of the breakup as he is a man who gets so attached to the woman he is in a relationship with.
There should be a very long mourning process he goes through to help him deal with his emotions. The Cancer man does not move on very quickly, he takes his time to detach himself and let go. He holds the relationship sacred in his heart and this really influences the way he says goodbye.
He is the last guy who would ever just hook up with as many people as he possibly can after a breakup. It really isn’t his style and frankly, he knows that this isn’t the way to deal with losing someone he cares for.
What To Do to Get A Cancer Man To Come Back
As I mentioned; it may be very hard to get a Cancer man back. If the trust was broken; he’ll have a very difficult time ever trusting you again. He can but it will take some proving from you that you can be trusted.
He may also bring it up every single time you argue which can get old for you. It will take a great deal of time, patience, and love. Do everything you can to show him how much you love him.
Words are good but taking action to prove to him how you feel will allow him to actually FEEL it. Take care of him, be affectionate, and do whatever you can to show the Cancer man you care.
Cancer Man Breakup – Final Thoughts
There are many reasons why a Cancer man breaks up with a woman, but it is usually quite a difficult experience for him. He much prefers being in a relationship with someone he loves, to being single and on his own.
Dishonesty is the biggest reason why a Cancer man will usually break up with a woman. If he feels like he can’t trust her and that she is cheating on him or not being very forthright with him, then his intuition will tell him it is time for him to leave.
He feels things so deeply, so it isn’t a very easy experience for him to go through. It breaks his heart to break a connection with someone he once loved so much. This is why there is always a great deal of hope to get back with a Cancer man once you have broken up.
This is because he will always harbour intense feelings for you and won’t ever forget the connection the two of you once shared. That is, only if the two of you can sort out the problems you have within the relationship by learning to compromise and communicate better. That is the only way.
A Cancer man will definitely miss you when you are gone, you don’t have to worry about that. He is extremely sentimental and gets very attached to the women he goes into a relationship with.
He’ll miss you every day you are gone. It would just save you a lot of heartbreak to not expect any major declarations of love once he is gone. This just isn’t his style.
When a Cancer man misses you he may make subtle suggestions that he is thinking about you, but he will often depend on you to reach out so that the two of you can connect once again.
Space is a really good thing to give a Cancer man because this is exactly what he needs to remember how special you are and this might make him regret leaving you! He needs to realize what he is missing out on.
There is nothing more wonderful than being with a Cancer man…
He is so sweet, kind, caring, supportive, and gentle…
A true gentleman and the type of man you only thought you could make up in your dreams.
A Cancer man really knows how to love you and take care of you as no other man can.
However, things with your Cancer man have been feeling a little off recently.
You can’t put your finger on it, but it seems like he is slowly losing interest in you and the relationship.
This is incredibly heartbreaking as you love your Cancer man very much.
He is everything you have ever wanted in a man.
The thing is, you thought he was happy with you as well.
But you can feel your Cancer man backing away slowly.
All you want is to know that your Cancer man misses you and still cares about you.
There are times where he just ignores you and doesn’t get back to your texts.
It hurts you so much when your Cancer man doesn’t respond to what you have to say.
You never thought your relationship was going to end up like this.
And it feels like there is nothing you can do to make him come back to you.
What would you say if you knew that you could turn things around quite easily?
Would it make you happy to know that you can get your relationship back to where it once was?
< — Click here for more information
There is a lot you can still do to fix and rebuild your relationship.
This is not the end of the road.
This is actually just the beginning.
Don’t give up hope because there is so much love between the two of you and all relationships have their ups and their downs.
It is just about you taking control of the situation and realizing that there is still hope.
< — Click here to find out more information about how to rebuild your relationship
You deserve to be in a relationship where you get treated like a queen!
This is your chance to turn it all around.
I wish you so much love and happiness.
Your friend and relationship Astrologer,
Anna Kovach
I want to know if my cancer man is cheating, I’m a Leo and I always have this weird instincts when someone is cheating on me, he seems distant too. I asked him for a break and he wasn’t really moved… does he even love me at all?
Hi Derah!
Perhaps you would be better helped by looking at my article. You can search on the blog for “Cancer Man Cheating – Can You Trust Him?” ..That should give you some really good ideas on if he is or he isn’t. The important thing is that you listen to your own intuition. If you feel uncomfortable or that something is wrong then most likely it is. I cannot tell you whether or not he loves you, he has to tell you that himself. Ask him if he does and ask if he’s cheating. Call him out and find out what you need to.
I’ve been friends with a cancer boy for a while. We’re extremely good friends. We understand each other on an emotional and physical level and he always tells me everything on his mind (he trusts me a lot). He tells me how I am the first girl he has ever felt this close to and we spend a lot of time together. He had a crush on another girl for around a month and then had asked me to try and set them up together.. I had tried a lot and managed to give him some successes but the girl was stubborn and rejected him and is now dating someone else. After that, it took him a while but he was getting over her.. We started flirting and we became closer then ever. I knew he had a crush on me at the start of the year and I now knew that i had a crush on him too, so I let him know and he confessed his emotions. But after dating for 2 perfect days, his old crush sent him a message and things went downhill…We tried to talk it over but he said he just wants friends.. But he still gives me signs and said he doesn’t want to loose me and that he loves me but she still holds a space in his mind… I’m a Sagittarius girl..What do I do to get him back? I’ve read that we’re not compatible signs on an emotional level but our relationship is built on trust and emotional connection as well, and we’ve covered that loophole.. He also used to tell me about how he saw a future for us, living together and raising a family. Help?
Hi Autumn!
Sagittarius will typically get tired of Cancer man’s mood swings and the ability to be secretive. Sagittarius likes to have an honest partner that is stable and able to handle things. Cancer men act with their feelings rather than logic which is something Sagittarius doesn’t like either. That being said, this is what makes you not the greatest match. He used to want to be with you and have a family, etc but now that he’s talking to his crush, he’s pushed that on the back burner to see if there is anything left with her. That means you’d be second choice. You don’t deserve that sweetheart. I’d let him go. If he loves you and wants a future with you, he’ll be back. Otherwise, you deserve to have a man that is all yours!
Having a cancer men or woman in your life is like carrying a poisonous snake around your neck..never ever trust any cancer they are covert narcissists.
Hi Rashid!
Ouch! Sounds like you’ve been burned once or twice. Not all Cancer men are the way you described. Everyone has all 12 signs in their birth chart. That means you have Cancer in your chart as well. Consider that. Also moon signs and rising signs play a role in someone’s personality. If you’d like a bit more information on the Cancer man, you should check out my book “Cancer Man Secrets”.
Hi Anna, I said some harsh things to my cancer man of 2 years and he left. He told me that he didn’t want to be in a relationship with me and we he suggested that we be friends because he still wants to be there for me but being a friend. I have apologized and told him that I love him but he will not come back. I call hi he’s nice still tell me he love me but will not come back to me. Also I’m calling him first all the time. Should I just back off from calling and texting or keep calling him? I love him and want him back but I don’t know with a cancer man.
Hi Francis!
I am guessing whatever it was you said hurt him pretty badly which would make him want to say he doesn’t want a relationship with you. It’s going to take him some time to get past it whatever it is. Even if you’ve apologized, he needs to process it and think things over. Let it cool off for a bit and be his friend as he asks and maybe he’ll come back around. If you’d like a bit more information on the Cancer man, you should check out my book “Cancer Man Secrets”.
I’m married to a Cancer man who decided to give me the silent treatment when I couldn’t stroke his ego and then 2 weeks later told me we were not together in a heated argument. He said a lot of cold things and so did I. He left but called once or twice a week to speak only to my son (not his biological child). After another 2 weeks he called me around 6am stating I could talk to him about anything if I ever needed to but the relationship was over. He also bragged about how happy he was because I made him a better person by supporting for over 6 years. He said he would like a friendship and that guilt of hurting me made him want to maintain a friendship. He also asked about my life and what was going on. Why is he even doing this if he says he’s done knowing that right now I’m deeply hurt?
Hi Louise!
Yes, Cancer men can definitely pinch the heck out of you with the pincers. They don’t hold onto their anger for very long though which is good. I don’t like what he’s said though that you’ve made him a better person but only wants to be friends. What for? That sounds like he wants to move on and date around while hanging onto you just in case he can’t find anyone else better. Think about if that is something you want. Getting friend zoned is b.s. code for “just in case for later”. If you’d like a bit more information on the Cancer man, you should check out my book “Cancer Man Secrets”.
Hi! I was dating a Cancer up until I guess a few weeks ago. I told him yet another time that we should break up but I stressed out and didn’t mean it. He never responded. In fact, he never texted or accepted another call or text from me. I was up until almost a week ago constantly texting and leaving voice-mail. I asked that he just send me a text and let me know it’s over but he refuses. It’s like he just cut me off without a word. It’s been about 3wks and I have had any form of contact from him. After over 2wks I sent a final text that I loved him and that I wouldn’t bother him anymore (haven’t reached out in almost a wk). Should I assume that the relationship is over or is there a chance that he’s just cooling off? Thanks
Hi Leisha!
Sounds like he was the one egging you on to end it. This is why he’s gone totally cold on you since then. He feels that you’re in the wrong and he’s the good guy since you’re the one that broke it off. It also means he lost his feelings for you probably. Cancer men try to find tactics to get their lady to break it off so that they can be free. Going silent after that shows how little he was invested. If you’d like a bit more information on the Cancer man, you should check out my book “Cancer Man Secrets”.
I’m a Scorpio woman with Pisces moon and Scorpio Venus , he is a cancer sun with Capricorn moon and Leo Venus.
It’s been only 6 months but has been difficult. Started with my curiousity and jealousy about how he admires his Aquarius female friends , and him bring up past rships ( I told him from early on plz don’t talk about past as I’m not interested)
I always have been kind sweet gentle and forgiving.
He swore at me in public ( quietly) Bcz I questioned why she keeps inviting him over!
He walks away if I want to discuss a misunderstanding.
He gets irritated if I say something when he’s talking.
If I misheard a word and ask him what did he say , he says that I didn’t pay attention or am not interested that’s why I didn’t hear… and discontinues conversation.
If I repeat something , he says why are u repeating , I’m not stupid.
One of the arguments was I didn’t understand what he meant so I repeated something , he said you can do what u want, I said what do u mean ? He said ok this is turning into an argument, he’s not going into this, stop, doesn’t want argument… he then smiled and said he never had this problem with anyone else before? I said why are u comparing ?
I broke my foot he didn’t call. However wanted me to come over. I only found out later that he thought it was silly and irresponsible the way I broke it. ( he did kind of care and he was concerned about it when I was there).
We went for a small walk with me on my crutches, he got annoyed that I don’t walk properly on foot path and don’t stick to one side and said “people don’t even know which way you are going”. Then started to walk fast and way ahead of me as I was struggling with my crutches. I later told him did u get tired walking slow with me ? Is that why u walked fast and friendly way ahead of me ? He. Said this is too negative , this is his weekend and he doesn’t want negativity, left me, went on for his walk.
Later he said he misses his friends , he misses having intelligent conversations in which I replied why don’t u? He looked like a sad puppy … I said Bcz you guys are busy ? He said yep….
Every time there’s been an argument it’s been due to his reaction. He can repeat a word if I didn’t hear or understood, then things are fine .. but he says he doesn’t want an argument then walks off then I’m left puzzled !!
Next day he’s fine and he says he’s not a person to hold on to negativity. He wants to grow. He then smiles , he’s ok.
I’m just sad yet I m confused between his shot and then he’s kindness.
When he cares he’s nice
But then he’s an asshole
Ps
What gets me is that his top values in rship are kindness and respect!!!
If I treat him the way he treats me he will dump me on the spot I bet!!
Hi Abby!
Alright so with his placements, he has a more rigid attitude. Capricorn moon with Leo Venus? Well for one thing, his Venus indicates what type of woman he should be with as your Mars would tell you who you should be with as well. His is Leo so that means he’d be good with a Leo or another fire sign such as Sagittarius, or Aries. The other thing is, Leo Venus makes him think highly of himself as a lover and not shocking he likes so much attention with other women. He also cannot take criticism of any kind which is why he’s short with you. Now if you wan me to dig in deeper, you should check out my books on “Cancer Man Secrets”. Once you figure him out, you’ll either work at how you communicate or you’ll decide to leave it. I wish you the best.
Thank you
I am considering the book. Does it take into account his other placements ?
PsHis Mars is in Aries, mine is in sagittarius
Hi Abby!
It only covers the basics BUT it does enable you to have one free VIP consultation with me and so when you write in, you can send me birth info and your situation then I’ll guide you via that info.
I had the loveliest and most fulfilling relationship of my life (and I am not very young) with a cancer man, despite of the situation in 2020. Our anniversary and year end was approaching and we planned to be together. He texted in the late morning the day before to end work earlier, which made me the happiest woman in earth. I grabbed champagne and cooked. In the evening he texted that we have to talk, and when he called he simply said it may not be a good idea to be together, as he does not think it would work out… and that he met someone at work… I was shocked. When he came over in person, I saw a cold and distant person. What is this? Why? How shall I turned back from here?
Hi Maye!
Oh no! I am so very sorry to hear that he met someone. It would seem that she’s probably more convenient for him as she’s there. Sadly her giving him all the attention he wants feeds him and thus why he’s pulled back now from you. Yes, they do turn cold and distant when they change their minds. There isn’t much you can do unless he decides that she’s not the one. Cancer men do seem to fall for people they work with because they seem them all the time which is something they really like when being with someone. I think you’ll have to let go honey. Again, I am so very sorry.
Hi,
I am a Pisces and my Cancer male has been the man of my dreams. Our issue is a language barrier and his sensitive nature. He has been around my family and kids and I have been around his. We had been together for almost seven months and one moment changed everything. I made a joke with him calling him “Wack” and he threatened to leave me if I ever said anything about him again. The flood gates open over the next few days about everything I had ever said or did that he didn’t like. He had previously expressed he was very insecure and expressed a concern about not cursing or saying anything about him personally but he continued to joke with me and say things that I could view as offensive but because of all the ways he has expressed his love for me I never took offense. The day after I made the “wack” statement he came over and was agitated and accusatory. I really felt like he was trying to make me mad and eventually he did! He cursed and behaved in a way as if I annoyed him which happened once before when he thought I was still dating other people and that was months ago. He has displayed signs of distrust when I missed his phone call he would give me the silent treatment. I would then “conivince” him of my love for him and we would move forward. This time every incident we ever had came up (I’m an urban black with a native mexican who is not fluent in english)! I have never loved a man so much and all the things he has done for me beyond romance has truly been proof that he really loved me! Do Cancer men squander their “investments” easily? Can they just say they are done when the good outweighs the bad (his previous relationships have been women who have used him for his desire to provide or the children they had together)? And could it be I am a rebound ( he dated another woman off and on for 10 years who told him it was ok to see other people because of his sexual needs and who cost him thousands of dollars and took advantage of him as a provider)? I am an independent mother of two children and have only tried to help him as well as do things to make sure he knows I appreciate him. My kids adore him and he adores them. The last time we argued because I offended I begged, cried, and did everything I could to convince him otherwise. I am afraid that his ability to throw away everything so easily about a joke is not worth me trying to convince him to stay and I want to make sure I’m not making him feel guilty for leaving me which would result in him leaving anyway? I don’t know what to do …with such a gentle and loving spirit from a man in ways I’ve never had before I am devastated and hurt that my kids have been so involved with this man. Its crazy because my daughter (who is very critical of anyone I have dated as well as psychologically fragile due to her fathers alienation) just claimed him as her step father. They want to call him to find out what happened as I am devastated right now!
I know this is long but …he brought up things that were not accurate as well as things I agreed to do after he said they were important to him such as cooking and and washing his clothes (smh). I do not mind cooking and cleaning for a man but I was married for 15 years and realize that a man will not buy a cow if milk is free. I have since told him that I don’t mind playing Wifie as he has earned the husband title regardless of a piece of a paper but after telling him I don’t mind he hasn’t taken advantage of my offer and I found out that this was still an issue (he asked me that when had first started dating). I need to know should I start grieving and prepare to move on or should I work hard to fix this as I have never had a man who could just abruptly dismiss me and this man is beyond romantic…he was truly my best friend.
Hi Tarneya!
It sounds like he is a bit of a chauvinist. He was probably raised in a household where the mother did all of this while father worked. Now he has this idea in his head that the woman he gets involved with need to be this role. He’s trying to treat you like a slave and it isn’t right. We cook for our men because we love too but when we don’t cook, it should be a make it or break it to the relationship. That isn’t love I don’t think you can “fix it”. You may give him what he wants but then he’ll still find ways to treat you badly or “dismiss you. I would let go, work on your personal healing, and keep your heart open for the right man.
Hello miss Anna,
So I’m in relationship with a cancer man for 3 months now,we had a good start,talking about having our own kids,when to get married how our house would look like. Im an aries and I live this man so bad and I know he does to ,last January we keep on arguing with nonsense things but we always end fixing it we are on LDR,everything was so hard. Last week of January he suddenly went MIA for a week and I was so worried since we didn’t fight before that and his last message saying he loves me, I don’t know what went wrong. Last monday we talked I asked him what’s wrong he said nothing, I asked if his breaking up with me he said his not. He said he wants some time to fix and understand his s3lf but my instincts tell me that it’s something about us. I asked him if I’m still part of his future plans and he said yes I am,he said h3 just want me to understand that he feels completely empty and his out of motivation in all things. Im so worried we would end up breaking up cause I cant and he knows I wont break up with him. What should I do now.??
Hi Flor!
Cancer me sometimes need time for themselves because they become overwhelmed with life. It sounds like this is what is happening. If everything was fine before there is no reason to believe that he would just be done with you. The logic just isn’t there. I think he’s dealing with other things that he doesn’t want to talk to you about quite yet. I believe he will. Just be patient and give him some time. You can still reach out to him to make sure he knows you’re not gone. He’ll explain things when he can. Sending you blessings.
Hi so I’m an aries sun with a scorpio moon and cancer rising. He’s a cancer sun, with Pisces moon, and sagittarius rising. We dated for about two years but we broke up about 4 or 5 days ago. He tried breaking up with me last month but it didn’t work because I wanted him to stay and he agreed. He did become a little emotionally detached ever since his first attempt to breakup with me. I didn’t wanna break up and I actually wanted things to move forward and for us to grow with each other. I kept trying to tell him that but he didn’t really say much and didn’t believe that we could grow. So he initiated the breakup. He said he wasn’t happy anymore and that he still loved me and regrets doing this so much. I do admit, many times before I tried to leave over little arguments but he would always tempt me back in. So I was very in and out with him. This time, I really want our relationship to grow and be in a long term commitment. I already know the changes I need to make and what I need to do to fufill his happiness. He has blocked me on all socials except my phone number. The last message I sent was that I was disappointed. Ever since then he hasn’t texted me. I don’t know how long I should leave him alone or if I should even try to text him again. What steps do I need to take for him to contact me?
Hi so I’m an aries sun with a scorpio moon and cancer rising. He’s a cancer sun, with Pisces moon, and sagittarius rising. We broke up about 4 or 5 days ago. He tried breaking up with me in February but it didn’t work because I wanted him to stay and he agreed. I didn’t wanna break up and I actually wanted things to move forward and for us to grow with each other. I kept trying to tell him that but he didn’t really say much and didn’t believe that we could grow. So he initiated the breakup. He said he wasn’t happy anymore and that he still loved me and regrets doing this so much. I do admit, many times before I tried to leave but he would always tempt me back in. So I was very in and out with him. This time, I really want our relationship to grow and be in a long term commitment. I already know the changes I need to make and what I need to do to fufill his happiness. He has blocked me on all socials except my phone number. The last message I sent was that I was disappointed. Ever since he hasn’t texted me.
Hi Lily!
Alright the first thing for you to know is that it’s not your job to fulfill anyone’s happiness. It’s not his job to fulfill yours either. He has to make himself happy and you need to make yourself happy. When you are both happy, you can be happy together. He’s not happy which doesn’t mean you’re the culprit. It means something inside him feels something isn’t what he wants and so he sees it necessary to move on. I don’t think you making “changes” will make him want to change his mind. He’s settled on the ending. What you can do though is accept your life path, work hard at your own happiness and perhaps with time, he’ll tune back in and see how happy you are then want you back. Otherwise, just make yourself happier than you’ve ever been!
I’ve been dating a cancer man for 3 years, I’m a Libra. In the past 6 months we have had 3 fights resulting in, not speaking (6 weeks one time), then making up without really talking about what happened. Just picking right up where we left off. I’m usually doing the apologizing and owning my own contributions to the turmoil, but he rarely takes responsibility for any of it. Almost takes pleasure that he pushes me over the edge. Well, he finally told me he was purposefully doing it because of the argument that started it all, where he felt I had completely betrayed him and undermined his relationship with his family. Every time we try to talk about it, he gets angry again and shuts down. Mind you it was 100% my fault, I have apologized for my actions profusely and tried to assure him my intentions were not what he claims them to be. He’s now told me that we are in different places in our lives and I deserve someone who is of my same mindset and place in life. There’s 5 years between us and his kids are almost all out of the house and mine are in elementary school. Rather than arguing with him and making sure he feels the hurt he’s inflicting on me, this time I simply said “I understand” and left it at that. Now he’s sending random text messages. There was no period of silence, he started texting later the same day I accepted it was over. They’re friendly messages, like we didn’t just break up. I would like nothing more to be able to talk to him and try to resolve and stop this cycle, but I don’t know how. I’m afraid he’s testing me to see if I’m still interested, or maybe he’s just trying to be friends, which I can’t do at this point. I do really love and care about him, but I just don’t know what to do anymore because I don’t understand what he’s trying to do??
Hi Liz!
I would flat out ask him what is going on. Tell him you aren’t sure what is going on and you would really like him to tell you about it. Tell him it was also an unfair ending before because you two hadn’t actually had a heart to heart so that you could even get on the same page. Tell him relationships take work and communication. Then if he stays connected and talking, then you can tell him you would be alright with trying again but just being friends alone would be too painful for you. I hope this helps you but if you need more assistance, you really should check out my books on Cancer Man Secrets.
Good evening I was dating a cancer man for the last three months, things were amazing and then we both got covid and he went into his shell and stopped texting me I love you and miss you and asked for space. I gave it to him and then he told me he couldn’t do the relationship anymore as his feelings for me were so intense he is scared I am going to hurt him.. we met up as I wanted closure and he hugged and kissed me and said he wanted to see me again, which gave me hope. We then met up on Friday and he told me he couldn’t do it he was too scared of the feelings and he would hurt me.
Upon getting home he drunk messaged me all night and told me he loves me and misses me and sees a future with me but again is so scared..
the next morning he told me he loves me and he is not sure what he wants but that I deserve to be happy and I deserve more than he can give me. We never fought or anything just both of us got sick. He has continued to text me still and let me know what he is doing and asks if I’m ok.. I wrote him a text saying I wrote him a letter saying good bye and he called me by my full formal name, the one only important people call me like my parents or my close friends.. and then when I dropped off the letter he gave me a heart symbol on my text.. is there still a chance for this Virgo with my special cancer man ?
Hi Anne!
Yikes, getting sick can throw a sensitive Cancer man off his game. It gave him lots of time to think about things and then that’s when the worries creeped in. He’s going to need a bit of time for him to get himself back together. If you’re patient and sweet to him, he will likely come back around. It sounds like he’s got too much on his emotional plate currently. Wait him out. Learn more about what you can do by reading my books on Cancer Man Secrets. It may help you to win him over for keeps!
I met this male cancer and I’m Pisces. I was blow away by this man. I mean his kindness was unmeasurable. His kindness is everything I’ve ever wanted. But it’s super early we’re like two weeks in and then he has a chronic health condition. He did tell me about previously. And it started to act up and I helped how I could but when he got sick the communication completely faded. I tried to just send messages because it was so new for us. I made him a get well basket. He loved it but the communication died out. I don’t want to continue to reach out because he hasn’t responded in two days and I don’t know if he needs space for healing or if he has lost interest. I’m trying to believe what he tells me but at the same time there are a lot of factors and if a man doesn’t call you he needs space…right?
Hi Karima!
Yes, I agree with you. He probably just needs some time to wrap his head around his chronic illness and what is in the future for him. That must be very stressful. Give him a bit of time and I think when he misses you, he’ll reach out. I wish you all the best!
ive got a question…i met a cancer guy over work. i was in a relationship so i didn´t pursue my interest in him.
1,5 years later and many times in between i have been thinking of him. long story short, i contacted him saying that i was interested. he told me he was seeing someone but was unhappy and that he might end it. We ended meeting up twice. Both times we flirted and had a really nice time together, nothing sexual just talking and getting to know each other. after the second date he dissapears. I text him after 2 days and he says he is in his shell, kinda hiding away from the break up with his girlfriend, complicated times and that the doesn´t want to get me tangled up in the break up….i get that but how long will it take till he gets back to communicating with me again?
Dear ChiCHi,
When a Cancer man pulls away, maybe he is trying to get some space between the two of you so that he doesn’t make any more mistakes. He wants to pump the brakes and try to get to know you over time but he knows that you’re excited and may not want to slow back down.
This would make him feel awkward and not know what the right thing to do is. Sometimes the Cancer man will back up far enough that he’ll suggest being friends first and trying to go forward from there.
Naturally, this will leave any woman confused as to why he’d be hot and start something then suddenly become distant or start to ignore you. He’s not firing on all cylinders and isn’t sure how to proceed. He’s confused.
Remember, a Cancer man is very sensitive and he is like an antenna to other people’s feelings which can be incredibly overwhelming to him. He needs to be on his own for a while so that he can disconnect from the world. No wonder the Cancer man does this disappearing act! Patience is required. Best of luck to you!